Each age of the child is characterized by certain bad habits. Babies weaned and nippled, thumb sucking or nail biting, toddlers school age gnaw, pens, pencils, rulers and even a pencil case and textbooks. Adults are well aware that this is harmful.
To establish the cause of a bad habit, you must first analyze and remember when it appeared. Where does he chew pencils? Only at school or at home too. Basically, children start chewing on pencils and other school items when they come to school. For most children, school is stress, a change of scenery and workload. The child is nervous, worried, and the pencil helps him relieve nervous tension.
This is especially difficult for children who did not go to kindergarten and prepared for school at home. In addition to the school load, they are adapting to the new team.
They need to publicly answer the teacher's questions, go to the blackboard. Children are afraid to say or do something wrong, especially if it causes ridicule from classmates or a remark from the teacher. Therefore, they are always nervous when they have to answer or write a test, and they begin to bite pencils without noticing.
If your child chews on pencils both at school and at home, try to estimate his load. Maybe he's having a hard time or he's not doing his homework. Or maybe he didn’t learn some material and it’s difficult for him to do his homework. So he sits, thinks how to make them, nibbles on a pencil, and his head does not have a single sensible thought. Help him with the lessons, explain the missed topic, he will feel much more confident and forget about the pencil.
Do not yell at your child if he chews on pens and pencils. So you will only aggravate the situation and will not help him get rid of this bad habit. Try to create a calm atmosphere at home so that the child can relax and feel support and understanding from you. Many parents think different ways to wean the child to chew on school supplies.
For example, you can buy him pens with beautiful original tips, and instead of wooden pencils, use metal ones with a hidden lead.
Often a child, getting into an unfamiliar and unusual for him school environment acquiring new bad habits. One of the most frequent is biting the caps or tips of pens, pencils or other objects. Often, parents are concerned about this fact, although many adults, during periods of reflection at work, sin with such an action. If the habit takes on a stubborn nature and school supplies are gnawed “to the meat”, the child may have severe stress or even develop a neurosis, then he needs help.
First of all, parents think that the reason for the fact that the child bites his nails or pens, pencils is stress and self-doubt, his strength in a new environment for him. He tries to focus on the main thing, to get rid of the problem, to withdraw into himself and thus "jam" the stress. Often, episodes of a bad habit occur when thinking about new tasks, comprehending the information seen and heard, as well as making decisions in the current situation. But, according to psychologists and educators, the habit of biting objects or nails does not help, but interferes with comprehension, distracting the brain and scattering attention.
Elementary boredom and lack of interest in the subject of study can lead to such actions. Many adults do the same in such a situation, or they occupy themselves with drawing, drawing circles, figures, or abstractions. Therefore, in the presence of such a habit, it is worth offering the child the same option, instead of gnawing pens and pencils, use them for their intended purpose.
Pathological causes: neurosis or anxiety
A child who is physically and psychologically unprepared for schooling may acquire a neurosis at the very beginning of school, which will manifest itself with various symptoms. Some children sniffle or blink, repeat stereotyped movements, and some chew on pens and pencils. The peculiarities of the psyche and functioning of the nervous system of children are such that they cannot sit for a long time without movement, this forms the phenomena of neurosis in them. Strong emotions, rejection by the team, a change in teacher or class, family problems and learning difficulties can become an impetus for the development of neurosis or neurotic states. Often, neurosis has deep and complex roots, and bad habits and stereotypical movements are just the tip of the iceberg. In this case, the help of a psychologist and experienced teachers will help.
Such bad habits are not only a loss to the family budget due to the rapid deterioration of office supplies, but also serious medical consequences. The simplest explanation that doctors put forward in connection with the occurrence of episodes of biting pens and pencils is a feeling of head or thirst, so parents should give the child snacks and water to school, or take care of food in the school cafeteria. In addition, it can be a manifestation of stress associated with mental or physical overload, as well as one of the symptoms of digestive tract pathologies. Methodically chewing and nibbling on pencils can reduce abdominal pain or eliminate cramps.
It is no less harmful for the teeth and gums of the child, they are injured, chips and cracks in the enamel occur, and the risk of caries is high. Long-term habits can even threaten bite problems.
Some materials from which pens and pencils are made can be hazardous to health and their systematic entry into the body can provoke serious pathologies.
Habit Control Techniques: Eliminate Stress
First of all, parents should find out where their child's stress comes from, what he is so concerned about and what causes him anxiety. In this case, games, conversations and various techniques come to the rescue, as well as increased attention to the child's concerns. If in a conversation he does not talk about the problem, you can try games at school so that the child simulates the situation and clarifies the details of the situation leading to stress. Maybe it's the severity of the teacher or the remarks of the children, worries about poor progress. Often, eliminating the causes of stress leads to the elimination of the habit.
It is important not to scold the child for mistakes and praise for the slightest success, to conduct conversations constructively and to the point, without shouting and raising his voice, on an equal footing. Psychologists suggest telling a story about a child who chews on their hands so that your son or daughter has the opportunity to evaluate himself from the outside. It is also worth mastering the game - “I gnaw”, this phrase will need to be pronounced every time an object is pulled into the mouth. This will seem funny at first, but then the child realizes the obsession of this action.
You can tell and show an educational video from the Internet about microbes and viruses that live on the surface of pens and pencils that are placed in the mouth, and their harmful effects on health. This is usually very impressive for children, and they think about safety before chewing on the pen. If the experience is serious, it makes sense to talk with your doctor about taking mild sedatives and sedatives in the form of decoctions, teas or tablets.
There are also simple tricks that in many cases can help in breaking the habit. So, this is the use of caps or tips, big size or awkwardly shaped, with sharp edges, or a beloved hero who is a pity to spoil.
Some parents suggest replacing one habit with another, scratching your nose or rubbing your earlobe instead of biting your hands, which is safer. So, irritation of the earlobes activates memory and attention, thinking, which is more useful for the student.
Some parents dip their pen in salt or pepper to counter the urge to chew on the bad taste. But this often does not help, and sometimes it can also harm the child, leading to allergies or mucosal burns.
Reason one: gnaws to concentrate.
So do many adults, only their manifestations are less noticeable: diligent workers often just suck on the tip of a pen or bite their lower lip. Surely this is the reason that prompts the little rodent to sharpen pencils with his teeth, if he is generally calm child, responsible for learning and has good academic performance. He goes to school, maybe not with great pleasure, but without fear, and he continues to chew on a pencil at home - when doing homework, For example. In such children, the habit of biting pens is not particularly pronounced - yes, the tips of writing instruments are slightly scratched and crumpled with teeth, but not bitten to holes. If you remove the pen, the child, in concentration, will begin to bite his lips or the inside of his cheeks. In the event that the habit is still annoying, you should simply replace ordinary pens or pencils with ones that are uncomfortable or “uninteresting” to bite - made of hard plastic or metal, with rubber bands or feathers at the end.
The second reason: he gnaws because he is nervous.
This happens when attending an educational institution is a strong stress for the child - he worries that he will not cope with the task, he is afraid that he will be scolded, he worries that he does not understand the topic of the lesson. He gnaws his hands literally to holes. Other signs that point to this particular cause are general excitability, problems with concentration, behavior and academic performance. If, when doing homework, the atmosphere around is calm and friendly, the child does not have a desire to pull foreign objects into his mouth, but if he is deprived of the opportunity to gnaw a pen at moments of nervous tension, the habit transforms into biting nails or other, even less suitable objects (pencil cases and textbooks). , For example). If this is also forbidden, there is a high probability of the development of neuroses and tics. Therefore the only correct option actions in such a case - an appeal to a specialist - a neurologist, child psychologist or a teacher whose subject the child does not understand.
The third reason: gnaws, because he is bored.
With the same success, he can draw in the margins of notebooks, count a crow outside the window or pick his nose - you need to do something while Marivanna lists 25 signs of autumn. In this case, the child does not stop chewing on anything even at moments not related to study - in front of the TV, for example. You can wean without fear of consequences, the main thing is to do it gently - without screaming and domestic violence. It is good to have a conversation with especially impressionable ones, telling where the pen could have been before the child put it in his mouth, describing the consequences and showing photographs of helminths. Thicker-skinned people should smear the tips of pens and pencils with a special bitter varnish (it is also used if the child bites his nails). You can buy a pen that will be a pity to gnaw - made of beautiful plastic or with your favorite cartoon character.
Often the child is not even aware that he is putting something in his mouth. One has only to concentrate his attention, as he himself will get rid of the “ugly” habit: tie or glue something unusual on the tip of the pen - a piece of ribbon, cotton wool, paper. When they enter the mouth, they will have a sobering effect on the "rodent" and help him control himself. For the same purpose, you can play “beaver” with your child: every time something is in his mouth, he must say “I gnaw again.” At first, the children are very funny, but when the phrase sounds 50 times in 10 minutes, the child himself understands that the problem exists and begins to solve it. Nobody wants to turn into a beaver.
There is one more simple advice: watch the student’s nutrition, because there is no desire to pull something into the mouth on a full stomach.
The material was prepared by teachers of the Center for Development and Education
Many parents face the problem of nibbled pens and eaten pencils. And, of course, every adult understands that it is not very useful for a child to put dirty objects in his mouth. In addition, such an occupation can be quite dangerous. A piece may break off from a pen or pencil and injure the child's oral cavity, internal organs and even block the windpipe.
Why does a child chew on pencils and pens?
First you need to determine the causes of this unpleasant and unsafe habit. The first step is to pay attention to psychological state child. Does he have stress or overexertion? Is he in conflict with teachers or friends. Or maybe it's you who sometimes behave incorrectly?
However, you need to understand that children are quite quick-witted. If your child continues to chew on pens for a long time, then his nervous tension may be stronger than you think. Talk to him, to his teachers, to his friends. Just don't turn into a fanatical detective. Gently let your child know that you are open to dialogue and always happy to help.
If you are absolutely sure that your child does not experience any stress, then the problem takes on a slightly different character. Most likely, the child is kinesthetic, that is, his condition depends on tactile sensations. Kinesthetics often fiddle with key chains, pieces of paper, keys, and other objects. This is fine. This is not a disease and it is impossible to get rid of it. Man was born that way.
How to get rid of the habit of biting pens and pencils?
If we return to the problem of "rodents", it becomes clear that it will be difficult to remove a bad habit, but possible. Together with your child, try to understand what process he is trying to stimulate when he gnaws on writing objects: concentration, attention, memorization. It is even possible that he gnaws the pen during any mental work.
Then you should come up with another, less dangerous and unpleasant habit for these processes. One option would be to twist a wire or paperclip in your hands. This will not attract the attention of the teacher, but at the same time will allow the child to satisfy his need for nourishing thought processes. At home, you can squeeze a ball in your hands, sort out beads, roll up cotton balls, tear a piece of paper.
Finally, it is important to note that you must protect your child and help him cope with any difficulties. So don't be too strict. Don't force your child to change this very minute. Remember that everything happens gradually, and rightly so!
Have you been chewing on caps since school and every time you apologize to a colleague, “undermining” her next pen? Or maybe you just can't resist the craving for tidying up everywhere, and you automatically line up cosmetic jars in even rows on your friend's dressing table, and then meet her indignant look? Say what you like, but a habit is really second nature, and getting rid of another “I” that interferes with normal life can be very difficult. However, before you get rid of something, you need to understand the reasons for its appearance, says psychologist Oksana Alberti.
We repeat the same action every day, sometimes without realizing it. We often stumble upon the disapproval of others, quarrel with loved ones, if the habits are completely harmful, for example, smoking or a passion for alcoholic beverages. But what is surprising is that no matter how hard we try to get rid of them, habits do not go anywhere. In addition to spoiled relationships with relatives and friends, we also get internal discomfort that prevents us from living. “Most habits are signals from our subconscious. If you know how to read them, you can understand about a person even what he does not understand about himself. You can also understand what he knows about himself, how he lived and lives, how he built himself. This requires desire, attention and a little knowledge, says the psychologist. That is why we undertook a very interesting, but difficult task - to find out what certain bad habits say about us.
Nail biting habit
Needless to say, a person with bitten nails looks repulsive? For many men, neat female fingers are a fetish, and therefore you should not count on increased attention to your person if instead of nails you only have something remotely resembling them. “The habit of biting nails speaks of internal tension, of unconscious anxiety. As a rule, it is associated with low self-esteem, lack of self-love. In addition, by nibbling our hands and making them ugly, we unconsciously punish ourselves for not being worthy of love. the expert comments.
The habit of chewing on the cap of a pen
First, every time you bring a pen to your mouth, remember that it can be dirty, and then you will start having problems not only on a psychological, but also on a physiological level. And secondly, such a habit will certainly negatively affect your reputation at work. Oksana Alberti is sure that a person who chews a pen is perceived by others as an unbalanced type: “This habit speaks of the internal anxiety and tension of its owner. And one more thing: as you know, any elongated oblong object in our unconscious is a phallic symbol. The habit of constantly sucking or chewing something like that is an unconscious way to get pleasure through the mouth (oral). This may indicate a high degree of subconscious concentration on erotic pleasures.
The habit of dirtying the pen cap will certainly negatively affect your reputation at work.
Smoking and addiction to alcohol
According to the psychologist, the role of physiological dependence in this case is greatly exaggerated, and talking about physiology is just a way to justify one's own unwillingness to give up addiction: “Smoking and alcohol give us additional pleasures, give us a feeling of energy, shake our senses. They also play the role of some psychological« painkillers» . Often people who are engaged in active intellectual activity smoke - they need it to slow down their actively working consciousness.
overeating habit
Unfortunately, some people cannot stop in time not only with alcohol, but also with food. They eat until the button on their jeans pops off with a crack and until they feel sick. As a result - excess weight, dissatisfaction with oneself and an uncontrollable desire to seize the grief that she created for herself. “The root of most of our bad habits is the desire for additional pleasure. Food is a great pleasure. In addition, in our subconscious, food and sex are very similar in sensations. When we lack love, we try to make up for it with sex. When there is not enough love and sex, we compensate with food, ” Oksana Alberti explains.
Fanatical love of order
Such people are called cleansing - they put things in order everywhere, and even where they are not asked about it. This sometimes really annoys those around, because such behavior takes the form of mania, and not a healthy craving for cleanliness. “This habit speaks of a person’s craving for an ideal, and it can prevent you from feeling comfortable if someone violates your perfect order. The more you want to keep something perfect, the more often it will be violated, because the perfect does not exist in the world. And the stronger your desire, the greater the trauma for you will be the violation of this ideal. For example, you will constantly quarrel with those who rearrange things on your desktop, and you will become simply unbearable for your colleagues, the expert comments.
The habit of asking again
Surely you sometimes ask the interlocutor for the end of the phrase, although you heard him perfectly. Many are wondering why this is happening. Oksana Alberti says: “Most likely, this refers to echolalia - an uncontrolled repetition of the last phrase heard. This phenomenon in adults may be a symptom of developing schizophrenia or other mental illness. In this case, it is better to contact a specialist.
The habit of picking something
If you are haunted by a healing wound, nail polish, a pimple that has appeared and you definitely want to pick them up, then most likely you need to work on achieving inner harmony. “This habit is akin to nail biting - it speaks of anxiety, dissatisfaction. Also about subconscious idealism - you want everything to be somehow perfect, but most importantly - not the way it is now. For example, you touch the uncured nail polish - this is a subconscious desire that it dries as quickly as possible and makes you perfectly beautiful as soon as possible. Same with pain—it speaks of a constant inner rush', explains the psychologist.
The habit of cracking fingers
According to Oksana Alberti, men crack their knuckles more often than women. “Such a habit speaks of inner self-doubt,” adds a psychologist.
The habit of biting cheeks and lips
Those who constantly bite their cheeks from the inside and lips are familiar with the problem of the appearance of unpleasant sores in the mouth, but this is not the only difficulty, the psychologist says. “The mouth is a place through which we receive many sensual pleasures, not only from delicious food, but also erotic ones. Unconscious self-injury in the region of the mouth is self-punishment for an excessive inward orientation to these pleasures.
The habit of tearing off labels
Previously, those who constantly tore off labels from everywhere (from shampoo packages, jars of cream and various pickles) were said to lack sex, but Oksana Alberti has a different opinion on this matter: “Again, it’s about idealism and perfectionism. In our subconscious, a smooth and clean surface looks more perfect.”