It is impossible to live life together and not quarrel. As they say, dear ones scold - they only amuse themselves. But the greatest secret of a long relationship is learning how to fight. This, of course, does not mean that you need to make a scandal on any insignificant occasion, because this can soon become a habit and communication style, and then, even if you want to change something, it will be almost impossible to do so. You need to quarrel rarely and correctly.
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When he provokes you:
What to do if the husband comes home late, drunk, dissatisfied with everything in the world and his behavior is clearly asking for a quarrel? Let's first understand why he behaves this way. Such male behavior signals the presence of a problem that a man is not ready to voice. Think about it. It doesn't have to be a problem in your relationship. Perhaps something is not going well with him at work, he quarreled with a friend, but you never know what. But if a man demonstrates conflict behavior, it is advisable to be alert and find out what's wrong. If you can guess what is the reason for the attacks of a loved one (for example, you know that he has problems at work), try to make amends, calm down, cheer everything up. But if you don't know what it is, you need to find out. Very tactfully, gently and gradually ask him what happened: “Why are you in such a mood, my love, what can I do for you? Shall I make you some coffee or warm up dinner?” And then, of course, something will come out that worries or upsets him. The main thing is not to enter the phase of discontent, one wrong word - and a quarrel will break out, because this is exactly what he is trying to achieve.
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Correct response:
Two people in a bad mood is terrible. That's why we live in marriage, to pull up and complement each other: you can do what he can't, he can do what you can't. This is where balance is built, and this is the meaning of marriage.
If you respond with love and care to a man’s attempts at a scandal, the desire to start a quarrel will gradually fade away. You can’t improve his mood - just don’t interfere, go to another room, pour yourself some tea and take your favorite book, give him time to calm down. When there is no feedback from the opponent, it is impossible to quarrel with him. How to make a fuss when there is no return? Can you mess with a cat? With a wall?
Arguments are an important part of a relationship.
You need to quarrel when you have reason and enough strength. This is possible only if you start a quarrel, and your husband is completely unprepared for it. Then you have an advantage.
In general, quarrels are the prevention of more serious problems. They are necessary as periodic audits of the company, because they reveal those problems that, with general political correctness, may go unnoticed, and therefore unresolved.
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Do not avoid outbursts of anger, men need a shake-up
Nature has endowed us, women, with a unique mechanism that, in addition to our will, regulates our conflict. Women are infinitely patient, but there are several days in the month when it is better not to argue with us. These days are called PMS. When we are pregnant, nursing, or ovulating, we are sweet, calm, and non-confrontational. Everything is fine with us, we don’t worry about trifles, we don’t pull men, we don’t provoke anyone or anything. The whole world seems beautiful and magical to us. And the weather can be terrible, and money is not very good, but we are fine - we adore our husband, and his mother, and in general everyone, everyone, everyone. But if we have PMS, then excuse me, get it and sign it.
How does the conflict develop?
You once asked your husband not to scatter his socks, two, ten, and then you have PMS - and instead of a gentle request to remove the scattered things, an avalanche of anger falls on your husband. Of course, he could have heard you right away, but he didn’t, so he removed the rake. Will listen more carefully next time.
These monthly outbursts of intolerance for a husband's shortcomings should not be avoided. Once a month, a small shake is necessary for a man. After all, it is not just that in the course of evolution those women who have PMS survived. Nature does nothing for nothing, everything is logical with her. It is very useful for us sometimes to listen a little more to ourselves, to the signals of our body. Once a month we have the right to take out the brain of her husband. But there is no need to abuse it. The theory that all negativity must be thrown out of oneself instantly - letting off steam, is not confirmed by life.
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Rules for quarrels that will not harm your relationship:
It is very important what exactly you say during a quarrel. You need to quarrel, leaving yourself a way to retreat. You need to control your words during a quarrel, because if you don’t do this, you can say such things that even after reconciliation there will be a residue. You can't insult each other! Otherwise, you can drown in insults and, instead of solving existing problems, create new, much more serious ones.
You can swear using only those words that are considered more like compliments. For example, you can’t say “insignificance”, but you can say “scoundrel” or “reptile”. Even within a quarrel, nothing should be said that you will then sit and remember: “But he called me that, he really thinks so.” You can’t stoop to insults, because then all these words will always be between you. Learn to restrain yourself and learn to restrain him. Our task is to let off steam, to say (even if too emotionally) that we are not satisfied - that's it, there are no other tasks.
By and large, one should not even swear at a person (because if he is an ugly person, then who are you if you married him?), But at the wrong actions. “You acted like a fool” - such formulations never cause aggression. “When you do this, I feel abandoned and abandoned” - you talk about your feelings, and quite clearly, but without insulting or blaming him. And the next day you can sincerely smile at each other, but if you insist that he is a goat, it will be more difficult for both you and him to smile.
The person lives in society. Each of us is constantly or from time to time surrounded by other people, forced to contact them, face other people's opinions and unpredictable reactions to some words and deeds. At the same time, conflicts of interest are inevitable, which means that disputes and quarrels are inevitable.
How to behave in this case? Arranging a noisy scandal is indecent and harmful for further relations, and often not only with the immediate opponent, but also with people around who are not involved in the collision. Among other things, an open surge of aggression entails stress with all negative consequences for health. However, hiding negative emotions and trying to ignore conflict can be even more dangerous. Unspoken grievances and claims tend to accumulate, which reflects badly on psycho-emotional state, and the relationship between people does not improve.
The problem can be solved. There are ways to participate in a conflict situation that allow you to let off steam with minimal losses for both parties.
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"Speak out" in writing
Sometimes the person who irritates you is unaware of it. An attempt to make claims to him one day will lead to a protracted conflict: unexpected accusations will cause resentment and a desire to insist on your own, and it will be very difficult for you to understand each other.
If this is the situation, it is worth trying to express negative emotions in writing. The process of creating a text disciplines the mind and allows you to clearly formulate thoughts. The letter can be edited as much as necessary, honing the wording and removing overly emotional phrases. The resulting "sheet of anger" will not contain incoherent angry cries, but a logical list of complaints; ideally, it should also include a description of how to solve the problem.
It is better to write such a document by hand: it helps to concentrate. But sending it to the opponent is not necessary at all. The method allows to reduce the intensity of emotions and eliminates the need for a direct clarification of the relationship. If you do decide to talk to the "enemy", then you will most likely do it calmly and confidently, with a willingness to compromise.
Assess the conflict for the future
The situation that provoked violent emotions may not be as catastrophic as it seems at first glance. In most cases, over time, resentment loses its sharpness.
Try to evaluate your dislike from this point of view. Will you be just as angry and indignant tomorrow? How about in a couple of weeks? If not, you should not immediately go into open conflict. It makes sense to get distracted by doing current affairs, or simply follow the folk wisdom “the morning is wiser than the evening” and avoid stress.
Avoid personal accusations
It is pointless to quarrel with a person who is acutely unpleasant. Nothing can be solved in this way, you can only create a long-term conflict that is dangerous for both sides.
In all other cases, negative emotions are provoked not so much by the people themselves, but by their specific actions. That is why in the process of clarifying the relationship, one should refrain from going over to the individual. With a calm "debriefing" it is much easier to find a constructive solution and peacefully correct mistakes.
Don't offend your opponent
The opponent is more likely to be loyal to criticism of his behavior, if not to say that he is not at all bad person(stupid, lazy, illiterate, dishonest, etc.). Also, you can not impose on him a sense of guilt ("you do not love me"). Even with the deepest and most sincere resentment, you should not try to hurt in return. This is a dead end path, aggravating grievances and claims, and in the long run leading to a complete break in relations.
Do not quarrel in front of witnesses
The process of clarifying the relationship cannot be made public. It's not even that such actions look like an attempt to find supporters and use them to influence the opponent, which is incorrect. Much more important is the fact that one of the parties will have to admit that they are wrong, and it is much more difficult to do this in the presence of strangers. Solving the problem one-on-one, you will eliminate the conflict much faster and find a way to agree with each other.
It is absolutely unacceptable for spouses to quarrel in the presence of children: this not only reduces the level of trust in the family and damages the authority of adults, but also causes psychological trauma for the baby. A child involved in a conflict between parents automatically takes the side of one of them and considers himself guilty of betraying the other. Experiences adversely affect the state of the nervous system, lead to a decrease in efficiency, memory, intelligence and can cause serious health problems.
Feel free to apologize
It is believed that both sides are to blame for the conflict, and this is almost always true for family quarrels. Nevertheless, you do not need to constantly delve into yourself and consider each of your actions “under a microscope”, looking for possible mistakes. A person living with a chronic sense of guilt is, in any case, a very uncomfortable partner: he always torments himself, and provokes others to a dismissive attitude and other unworthy acts.
However, sometimes it is useful to consider a controversial situation from the point of view of admitting one's own mistakes. If there are any, the surest thing is to be the first to declare one's wrong, to a certain extent disarming the opponent. This act should be deliberate: it is important to clearly state what exactly you consider your mistake, but not take all the blame on yourself. This will help to resolve the conflict, while maintaining mutual respect of the parties. With a person who knows how to apologize in time and with dignity, as a rule, they communicate easily and willingly and very rarely quarrel.
The ability to competently get out of conflict situations speaks of a person’s self-confidence and self-sufficiency. People who have mastered this art are less prone to depression, sleep disorders, hypertension and other problems associated with psycho-emotional overstrain.
Video from YouTube on the topic of the article:
If a girl is given free rein in anger, then she can drag a man off a galloping horse, and even make him lame. Well, of course, a horse. Attacks of bad mood, troubles at work, crying baby and sleepless nights able to unbalance anyone. That is why quarrels happen in any family. To resolve disputes with knives - everyone knows how and practices it, but only not everyone conflicts correctly. That is, so that after a quarrel it is bitter not to regret what was said.
Rule number 1: do not infringe on the male ego
Male dignity is extremely vulnerable and very impressionable. But in a fit of mutual statements, frank battles often arise in order to find out who outdoes whom with a red word. The desire to prove why your opponent is wrong for such a reason can be such a priority at a hot moment that we literally go to the most painful places of a loved one. “But your business didn’t work out, you always think that it’s cool, but in reality it’s zero!” and other blows below the belt become even more offensive and treacherous for a man. After all, you, in fact, are for him the first and often the only confidant in difficult times. Keep yourself in tight rein at the moment of a quarrel, do not humiliate, do not drown and do not use moments of male weakness as an argument - this is a betrayal!
Rule #2: Don't Throw Big Words
Never, even in a fit of the most serious despair, do not manipulate the saint and do not juggle emotions! “If I knew you like that, I thought three hundred times before marrying you!”, “If you do this one more time, we’ll get divorced!” and other women's threats, spoken in the heat of the moment, affect men in the opposite way.
He does not feel that you just wanted to get through to his heart. He hears only reproaches, your regrets about marriage and thoughts of divorce. It will not be corrected, because you already decided everything. Well, it makes no sense to try if you already have such terrible thoughts!
Rule #3: Don't Pound
No normal man can withstand the regime of a woodpecker woman. Learn to resolve conflicts in one day and close any problem at a time, and not live with it for weeks and, at every opportunity, remember how he was very guilty “three days ago”.
Rule #4: Don't make a lump out of a thousand problems
A favorite girl's idea is to sculpt a huge snowball of several problems. Everything usually happens on emotions and spontaneously. They begin to discuss a specific problem together, and then it suddenly dawns on the wife that this is deja vu, and the husband is not lucky in life, and a string of his bad traits began to dangle on the notorious lump. Learn to solve the current problem, and not remember the old ones at every opportunity. He pasted the wallpaper obliquely and crookedly - it means that he is only to blame for this, and not for the fact that in life his hands grow from the wrong place, and therefore he cannot even be trusted with children!
Rule #5: Don't Epic Comment on an Argument
It’s not at all worth it every time during a quarrel to emphasize your dissatisfaction with sweeping, large-scale comments: “Oh, it would be better if I didn’t ask you for anything!”, “It’s easier to do everything yourself normally!”, “You spoil everything your hands touch! » etc.
Otherwise, soon you will definitely come to a reciprocal click on the forehead: “So don’t ask! So do it yourself! What is the question?!”
Rule #6: Don't Hush Up Your Grievances
At the same time, hushing up your grievances, hiding them until “better times” in the female piggy bank of pride, is also not the best solution. Firstly, it comes out sideways to you and is reflected in the outside world in the form of reflection. Deflexion is a barrier mechanism whereby you avoid direct contact with the problem, so you break down over nothing. For example, you start to get angry at children because of some trifle or become isolated in yourself. Secondly, psychosomatics is an extremely insidious thing. While you walk around with hushed up insults or unspoken words, this internal negativity can develop into poor health, and then completely affect your health!
And finally, I would like to add a couple more golden rules for the proper resolution of conflicts. Never go to bed without making up! Do not take away your nightmares to a new day and do not fall asleep in a bucket of tears. And most importantly, start a serious conversation only on a full male stomach, learn in time to switch a man in a fit of a quarrel - flip the topic, hug and discourage “at the wrong time”. From such behavior, the fuse, as usual, quickly fades away in both.
There lived a grandfather and grandmother. They lived long and fought hard. Grandfather screamed, grandmother screamed even more. One day, the grandmother ran out of patience, she went to a neighbor for advice: how to stop quarreling with her husband? The neighbor gave her "magic" water and said: "Whenever you want to quarrel with your grandfather, put this water in your mouth and you will see - the grandfather will shut up himself." That's what Grandma did. And - about a miracle! The scandals have stopped. The grandfather wants to quarrel with the grandmother, but she takes water in her mouth and is silent. The grandfather became uninteresting, and the quarrels ended.
Let's talk about "magic" water or some other medicine for family quarrels. With the help of psychologists, we will try to quarrel correctly - so that no conflict will disturb your happy family union.
If it seems to you that you quarrel with your spouse more often than others, and all other families live in peace and tranquility, then you are mistaken. There is a statistic that couples on average quarrel 312 times a year. A quarrel can be caused by any family occasion: snoring, TV, Toothpaste, open refrigerator. It is estimated that 80% of fights involve money in some way. And more interesting information: do you think that you quarrel more often than you have sex? But then again, according to statistics, 30% quarrel, like you, more often than they make love. So your pair is not knocked out of statistical errors. We hope our advice will help most families.
- You will laugh, but the first piece of advice when arguing is not to avoid the quarrels themselves. Why? Because by avoiding them, hiding emotions, suppressing irritation, you accumulate resentment in yourself. Your memory begins to count how many grievances you have taken down, how many conflicts you have prevented. Then a small trifle-match is enough, and a quarrel arises, which is much stronger in power than those that you have endured. And it will be much more difficult to put out this quarrel. What is the result? Their number is decreasing and their strength is increasing. Do not tolerate, do not be silent, do not accumulate irritation - speak, discuss and argue a little.
- He will surprise you too. Try to swear as calmly as possible during a quarrel. Watch your urge to shout down and interrupt, even if you think you're right. Again, try to explain as calmly as possible what you do not like. Your partner will want to scream - that's for sure. Usually, during a quarrel, the volume rises sequentially from partner to partner, but at some point it turns out that there is nowhere to increase it. The volume on your side is muted as much as possible. You don't scream. “How is it?” your partner will think. Hold on. Calmly continue the quarrel, and it will imperceptibly develop into a normal conversation.
- During a quarrel, try to discuss exactly the topic of the quarrel. Focus on her. Do not be distracted by past grievances, mistakes and problems that you had, for example, when you were digging a garden 5 years ago. This will lead you to a dead end. Start with an open refrigerator and end with a dull shovel. Do not use quarrels to speak out on all topics in a row.
- Are you interested in the opinion of the partner with whom you live? Both in a quarrel and in a calm atmosphere, it should be understood that this is his opinion, different from yours, but it still exists. That is why it is so important to listen to each other in a quarrel! Try, although it sounds strange, to devote half the time to expressing your opinion, and the other half to listening to your partner's point of view as well. This is right! Yes, he is entitled to a different opinion. But if you decide to keep silent, the sword of lightning from your eyes, this does not mean that you are listening. You need to hear and understand why your partner thinks differently from you.
- Try to avoid insults. Any - offensive or harmless. This is the road to nowhere. If you allow yourself to start calling names, then sooner or later it will end in rude insults. Yes, it is really very difficult. Not only for you. Couples all over the world call each other names during an argument. And you try to do without it, no matter what feelings you experience at this moment. Remember your childhood - that's when it worked well. And now it's not worth it! You chose your partner, decided to live together. Therefore, no matter how you want to call him - this applies to you. This is your offensive name.
So, a lot of what was said above probably surprised or interested you. Try to take advantage of our advice. Or wise advice neighbors from a fairy tale about "magic" water. The main thing to remember and use in any family conflict is that the person you are quarreling with is your family! He is your favorite, he is always there. You swear not to leave forever, but just to express what worries you. Any fight must end. If you understand that the quarrel is reaching a dead end, its degree exceeds reasonable limits, and you and your partner are no longer quarreling, but hurting each other with words, stop the quarrel. Finish. Stop!
There are no conflict-free pairs. Quarrels are not only inevitable, but necessary. It is a quarrel that gives partners the opportunity to throw out the negative and talk about their dissatisfaction. I will talk about the rules of conduct during the conflict and the taboos that exist. Following my recommendations, you will learn how to properly quarrel and put up so that one day a skirmish over a trifle (for example, washing dishes) does not lead to a painful break.
Taboo in quarrels
The first and foremost rule is to never hurt your partner's sexual dignity. Instead of a thousand compliments, your lover will remember exactly the scandal during which you mocked his addictions or abilities. It's one thing to discuss the intimate side of a relationship in a relaxed atmosphere. And quite another - a deliberate barb, contemptuously thrown at the address of a man. It is not only male self-esteem that suffers from such attacks. Consider that from now on, the gap is just a matter of time.
Don't let a man doubt his own worth. Phrases such as “you are of no use”, “how could I marry you”, “and why do I need you” will bring your couple one step closer to breaking up. Do not convince your partner of his worthlessness. Men can't stand to be seen as pathetic and worthless. If you accuse him over and over again of the fact that your life passes by because of him - believe me, very soon he will leave even rare attempts to please you.
Never bring up the most painful topics. If a man is experiencing difficulties at work, do not question his professional qualities. If the last sex was not too good, try to restrain yourself and not be sarcastic. In the heat of a fight, all ways to hit harder seem appropriate. But when the conflict is over, you will be very ashamed of cowardice. A partner may try to forgive you, but your words will never be forgotten.
Don't make fun of physical handicaps. Such a tactic will deal a severe blow to the self-esteem of any person. If you have managed to mock your partner because of your short stature or the ridiculous shape of your ears, forget that you were once close. Examine your man's weak points so that you never touch them in the heat of a quarrel.
Ways to strengthen the alliance during a quarrel
Blaming a man for something is the most bad way convey to him the idea that you feel bad. Instead of “you are an everyday disabled person, at least once you washed your plate, just clean up after you” say “housework and work take a lot of my strength, I am very sorry that you do not appreciate my work.”
Instead of a “pathetic loser,” you send a message to your partner that their help is very valuable to you. Your man should know that he looks like a hero and a protector of comfort in your eyes if he takes out the garbage and puts his socks in the basket without reminders. Of course, such deliberateness seems ridiculous. Try at least once - it works.
It is important to talk about your feelings instead of blaming. Try not to label or insult your partner. Talk about what makes you uncomfortable in the form of I-statements. For example, “I am hurt because…”, “I am disappointed that…”, “I am very sad because…”. Psychologists often give this recommendation to couples in family therapy.
The phrases “you are a vile liar” and “it hurts me that you deceived me” only at first glance seem to have the same meaning. By accusing a man of something, you force him to take a defensive stance.. When you talk about your feelings, you are not judging his actions. But he will do it himself when he realizes that he has caused you discomfort. Speaking out your feelings good way resolve the conflict in your favor.
During a quarrel, do not remind a man of his past mistakes. If you were able to forgive him for a serious offense, find the strength in yourself not to remind him of this.
Think about the future. In the heat of a quarrel, stop for a second and try to disengage from what is happening. Consider whether the cause of such a violent scandal is really all that important. Imagine that you have already made up and now is the time to laugh at the situation. It is difficult to stop in a fit of anger and irritation, but it must be done. After all, if both have invested a lot of effort in a relationship, it’s stupid to destroy everything because of a trifle. Tell your partner about your thoughts. Let him know that scandal is as undesirable for you as it is for him.
Causes of conflicts
There are a great many reasons for a quarrel every day: you looked at a strange girl the wrong way, forgot about your mother’s birthday, left one cutlet in a frying pan and didn’t wash the dishes. In fact, these little things are just the tip of the iceberg. The true causes of quarrels are always hidden much deeper..
Most often, quarrels in a couple arise due to the fact that partners are in no hurry to justify each other's expectations. Be honest with yourself: when you first met your man, you were already annoyed by some little things. However, every woman is convinced that she can fit her soul mate to her own ideas about the man of her dreams. When this does not happen, mutual reproaches begin.
Speak unpleasant situations should be directly at the time of their occurrence. Later, when irritation grows to the limit, it is very difficult to restrain oneself and not say too much. Give your partner the right to be yourself, and in matters of principle for both of you, try to find a compromise.
Distrust of a partner often provokes conflicts in a couple. It may seem to you that your dissatisfaction is justified, because at his work new project with a nice colleague. Remember that this is not jealousy, this is distrust. If a man does not give you a reason to doubt his fidelity, and you are all looking for compromising evidence - think about it. Maybe you just need an acceptable excuse to end the relationship?
How to learn not to be jealous of a man? You can read about it in this one.
Fear of betrayal and deceit significantly undermines the emotional background of a woman. When our partner does not show his feelings to the extent that we would like, we begin to doubt the sincerity of his intentions. The reason for these doubts lies in self-doubt. No wonder they say that women dress up not for men, but for other women.
If you constantly expect a dirty trick from your soul mate, get on with your life: buy yourself those same shoes, go to the movies with a friend, find a hobby you like - fitness, reading, courses Italian. When a person is busy, he does not compare himself with others. If a woman is confident and feels that she is interesting and attractive to other people, her partner will begin to see the same.
The benefits of quarrels
Temperament, fatigue, discontent - all this only increases the intensity of passions. Sooner or later, the accumulated irritation results in a scandal. There are no conflict-free pairs. It is obvious that quarrels have practical significance. So why do people quarrel, and how to benefit from a conflict situation?
The absence of quarrels does not speak of harmony reigning in a couple, but of indifference, which destroys relationships faster than any scandal.
A quarrel is a great opportunity to clarify your desires and intentions, find a problem and solve it. If you feel dissatisfied with your partner, but he keeps silent about all the questions, alertness arises. If a man can express his dissatisfaction according to all the rules of a good quarrel, this will only make the relationship more trusting. It is important to know that your partner will be direct about their irritation and give you the opportunity to find a solution. For your part, you must give the same feeling to your man. Such a constructive conflict will only benefit the relationship.
Quarrels are also needed in order to relieve internal tension, to share your stress with a partner. Researchers from the Albert Einstein Medical Center concluded that the level of conflict is directly related to the amount of testosterone in the body. This indicator also determines the tactics of behavior in a quarrel for both sexes. A high concentration of the hormone in men makes them raise their voice and show aggression. Women are prone to debriefing and moralizing.
Regardless of gender, people need the opportunity to get rid of negative emotions. Hidden conflict is much more dangerous than open confrontation. You can and should fight. The main thing is to do it in a way that does not cause irreparable damage to the relationship.
How to reconcile
Reconciliation is an important part of any quarrel. Learn to deal properly.
Immediately after the scandal, take a short time out. Taking a break will help you cool down and look at the situation from the outside. Great for a quick walk. When you feel that you have come to your senses, you can start a truce. Be sincere. Let them know that you're sorry about the fight.
If you were the one who initiated the fight, start with "I'm sorry we had a fight." Do not try to prove your case, you can do it in more suitable conditions. Your task is to show the man that you have come to put up, and not to continue the scandal.
If the partner has not cooled down yet, do not take it as a personal insult. Give him time to recover. The worst tactic is to stir up another fight because of his mood. However, remember: if a man refused to reconcile, it is he who must take the next step towards reconciliation.
Answers on questions
Who should take the first step towards reconciliation?
The one who was objectively wrong should initiate reconciliation. If your partner started the fight, help him make peace with you. It is not necessary, because of a trifle, to be contemptuously silent for a week and ignore the existence of your companion.
How soon can I forgive him?
If a man has done something unacceptable to you, make it clear that a simple “sorry” will not return your location. This is how people are arranged - they do not appreciate what cost them nothing. Therefore, the man who offended you should, not with words, but with his actions, return your good attitude. If he doesn't even try, that says a lot about the value of your relationship to him. You are hardly on the way with this person.
Should physical abuse be forgiven?
Stop any rudeness in your address. Do not let a man insult you, threaten you, and even more so beat you. If this has already happened, do not try to justify his act, do not feel sorry for him. Remember: if he hit you once, he will definitely do it again. There is only one way out of the situation - a break.
What to remember:
- Never touch sexual and physical virtues in a quarrel.
- Express your dissatisfaction in the format of I-statements.
- Do not insult your partner, do not drag old disagreements into the conflict.
- Recognize your partner's right to not live up to your expectations.
- Spend your time doing activities that are enjoyable for you - sports, hobbies, recreation - to feel confident in yourself and stop quarrels based on jealousy.
- People don't appreciate things that don't cost them anything. If a man is seriously guilty, let him know that he must earn your forgiveness by his actions.